Everything Zen

Another lazy day of surviving. Heheh. One might think I'm not doing anything to better my situation. Not so! I am branching out. On Wednesday I attended Shambhala Buddhist Meditation group. It was wholly foreign to me, as I came with minescule prior knowledge of the religion? and it's practices. But that's what made it fun. I really got into it. I did the bowing. I shared my ideas on the Dharmic material. I chanted. That was my favorite part. The bulk of what we did was meditate, or sit. They call it sitting for a reason. The idea is to sit so that your spine and everything is in balance, and concentrate on your breathing so hard that your vision goes out of focus and you meditate. I found it quite hard to think of absolutely nothing. The times I was able to, I had this strange tingly sensation in my body, mostly my limbs. At best I felt like everything in the room was one solid mass, as if I could feel the incense soaked air adhere to my skin. It was kinda trippy at times, but I found nothing very spiritual about it. I thought of it as a kind of self-discipline, because it is not easy for me to be in a room with other people and sit still and quiet. If you knew me in real life this would make you laugh. I'm going to go again. What else better do I have to do?? Sit around?
The Brain Tuner
And today I tried something interesting called the Brain Tuner. Yup. The fucking Brain Tuner. My friend bought this device that uses electricity to shock your nerves into acting right. Haha! Seriously, I don't have a really good idea of how to explain the way this works but it made sense to me when I read about it. It's supposed to help repair the brain chemicals of drug addicts. Like to quit smoking cigarettes, etc. So I hooked myself up and I really do believe that it worked! I felt really sublime, and I didn't smoke. I did later, but it worked for awhile. It's not a miracle cure whatsoever, but I think it's interesting technology and reckless trial-and-error is just my style.

But you knew that.