Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Call Me Anna Karenina

In the morning when I wake for work, I roll out of bed after hitting snooze 2-3 times, and fall into my chair and check my email. First thing, every day. This morning I had a rude awakening. It was asserted that I should be executed without trial for my actions this weekend. I was aghast at the idiocy of this notion. Is that the way you think the world should work? Maybe you do. But you might want to consider your position on morality and guilt, because your time will come. I'm confident of that. But as the day wore on, and as it stands now, I could reeeeeallly give a shit about what anybody thinks about my hook-up. For real. I don't feel I need to defend it, and guess what? I'm not going to. You can paint me any color you like...I prefer black with a big pink letter "A" across my breast. Cool?

What we did together was very intimate and it's hard for me to be negative about it even given the imperfect situation. But it was the moment and we shared it, and it's those moments that make life worth living. I can honestly say I still believe that, even after everything I've been through. This is how I've always lived my life. To feel alive. There was nothing sinister nor lascivious about our tryst. It was a beautiful thing, and I've honestly never said that about sex before because that's just dorky. But it really was. Two people came together and shared something immeasureable to anyone but each other. Jesse gave me a special gift and I him. And I will treasure that forever. As for his relationship, that is something he must figure out on his own, as these things have a natural order. I can't help being a part of it, and that's not bullshit, because what we did together was a force of nature. There was no stopping it.

1 Judge not lest ye be judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured unto you.
The Gospel of St.Matthew chapter 7

7 comments:

Beth said...

Good for you...with one shining exception I think everyone was just worried about you.

You've had a hard time lately and I wouldn't want it to get worse, but as I said yesterday I'm glad you enjoyed it.

As for Vers 2.8, I guess there are some people who find it easy to live a perfect life...you know, except for the judging and namecalling. Idiot.

Bx

BrianAlt said...

Yep, sometimes it's just right!

You don't even need to address that BS.

N said...

You only get to live one life, for all we know. Better the seize the day than to mull over the what-ifs.

Unknown said...

So now you've had time to contemplate it, let's hear more about the sexiness of the hamstring.

Wombat

Yossarian said...

i see you care so little about it you posted about it. makes sense to me.

Blush said...

thats comforting, ha

K said...

I wholeheartedly agree.

What the hell is wrong with everyone judging?